Redundancy.
How does that word make you feel? Scared? Ashamed? Shocked? Angry? Maybe feelings of grief come up? Or maybe you feel relieved or even excited? Have you or someone you care about been made redundant? If so, did you / they experience a mixture of some or all of these emotions?
I went through a range of emotions when I was told I was being made redundant, from a job I loved and a company and customer whose values had diverged greatly from my own over the years. I had a Plan B yet I knew I would miss the people, some of whom I had worked with on a daily basis for over 20 years and who I regarded as friends as well as colleagues.
Also, I felt a great sadness at leaving a team I had built from scratch, proud of everything we had achieved together so far yet sad at the thought of not being a part of that success going forward. I also felt sadness, and a little angry, at the thought of my team being broken up into different sections and absorbed into other departments – no longer existing as it had. It felt as though my hard work, commitment and loyalty was being dismissed.
I had felt it would come at some point, due to various restructures that had already happened; a number of positions not being recruited for when colleagues left the business; the client going through numerous restructures themselves and a constant cry for more and more cost savings. Part of my growing frustration had been that other people could not always distinguish between cost and value – also the constant cutting back unfairly put further workload and stress onto the ones who were left to carry on keeping the business running.
Being made redundant does trigger feelings of grief, ‘’There is a change curve model for grief, called Kubler-Ross, which comprises denial, anger, bargaining, depression and acceptance. …. understanding a likely emotional pattern of losing a job can help people accept their situation and move ahead more quickly.’’ You can read more about this change curve by clicking the link https://www.workingwise.co.uk/the-five-stages-of-redundancy-grief/
Most of the negative feelings we have when faced with any change, especially redundancy, are brought about by the fact that we feel we have completely lost control of our lives, our future, the path we thought we were following. Are we ever really totally in control? Of course not, we believe we are – yet so many various people and factors affect us in many direct and indirect ways all of the time. Being made redundant is not personal, it’s a business decision, usually a cost saving initiative or as the result of some advance in technology now readily available so the job changes.
So, what can we control? Ourselves, our thoughts and reflections, our feelings and our reactions to, and decisions about, any given situation. When we decide to leave a job we are pro-active, updating our CV, applying for various different roles and being interviewed for potential new jobs – very much seeing the change as a positive step forward, progress and growth for ourselves and our career. When we are being made redundant what stops us being pro-active in the same way? Can we view this unforeseen and unexpected change as an opportunity? Can we take action, apply for other jobs, sign up for training courses and maybe even utilise this change to explore doing something completely different? Of course, we can, and we should – maybe this is the motivation we needed, and would not have necessarily found otherwise, to make some much needed changes, to explore new paths and start a new chapter.
The hardest part is accepting the change, letting go and embracing a different reality. This takes resilience, self-care, a positive mindset and a lot of support, plus time – time to adjust, time to reflect on everything you have achieved so far and the lessons learnt, time to accept what is and time to be ready to move on.
It has taken me the best part of 6 months to be ready – to be ready to move on and leave the last 23 years behind. To be proud of my own progress and also of the support I have been able to give to my team and colleagues. One of the hardest parts of this process has been the change in daily routine – it has taken a while to accept that I can decide my own daily routine now – one that suits me, having spent such a long time needing to be available for others, to support them and deal with issues and queries that frequently surface, spinning lots of plates and hardly ever making myself the priority, I have learnt that it’s ok now to do what is best for me. Whilst there are still some unknowns in my future, I can now feel excited for what’s to come, enjoy the challenge and know that the hard work and effort I put in directly benefits me. I cannot stress enough how important a routine and structure are – whatever works for you, establish a new routine and stick to it, something that includes a task to complete, a form of exercise and purpose each day. Day by day it will become your new normal and when you find yourself dealing with a life changing situation that structure will be what gets you through each day.
We place so much emphasis on our physical wellbeing and we are all now realising our mental wellbeing requires the same amount of focus too. Just like a personal trainer is there to advise, keep us on track and make us accountable to be physically fit, we at Emerge are able to offer one to one sessions that will enable you to overcome any negative or limiting beliefs and thoughts that may be holding you back. We will also support you to work and focus on your confidence and goals, so that you are able to achieve everything you want to in life.
It may be that you require a couple of sessions to get you back on track and reignite everything you already know, or you may wish to embark on a journey to achieve those lifelong goals and dreams. Whatever your goal, whatever your dream know that it’s all achievable and Emerge will support your growth with integrity to fulfil your purpose and we very much look forward to hearing from you to discuss how we can support you.
About the authors – Sarah & Carmen are Life & Wellbeing Coaches, Founders of www.emergebewhoyouare.co.uk their passion dedicated to enabling people to boost and maintain their resilience and fulfil their full potential. Please contact them to learn how they can support you in living your best life. You can also follow them on Facebook and Instagram for a daily dose of positivity @emergebewhoyouare.
